Dear Madd Hatter,
So, where to begin...I'm going on 30, and my life is, well, just in a rut. I'm married, which is nice I suppose, but it just seems like the same old routine, day after day. A typical day for me is as follows: I get up, go to work, come home, cook dinner, clean up after dinner, make my husband's lunch for the next day, set the coffee maker for the next morning, throw some laundry in if necessary, and then settle in for some TV, or what not. In other words, not very exciting. It's a sad situation when the most exciting thing that happens to me all day is watching Deadliest Catch re-runs, know what I'm saying? (Speaking of which, I have sort of a question within a question...Is it weird that I fucking love that show?) So I guess my question, Madd Hatter, is if you have any suggestions/tips for getting myself out of this funk, and spicing up my life a little. I'm ready for some excitement and pretty much up for whatever!
-Eager Beaver
Dear Eager Beaver,
Im just gonna start this out right now by sayn I LOVE Deadliest Catch too and Yes, I cried like a bitch when Capt. Phil died. All Im sayn is that shows not gonna b the same!!! So to answer ur question within a question, NO....ur totally normal to love that show! Hell I got friends who do Deadliest Catch parties for the show, so I mean......who's weird now?!!! ANYWHO.....As Im sitn here reading ur recent question, I cant help but notice u sound like an "Old Soul", as I myself am. Only difference is Im not married nor do I drink coffee. I on the other hand do work and cook and clean and do laundry like a typical HouseBitch! And Ill add my ADULT ADD, which Ive been recently upgraded to, guess 'they' think Im an adult now....sry, I tend to rant off track! But my ADD tends to MAKE me do these things or Id go insane! But on the upside, there R ways to make ur life not so boring....bcuz my God, I cant lie, I wanted to blow my head off thinkn ab bn n ur routine everyday....just sayn! As Im PUSHN 30 like urself, I find Im startn to like to do things I used to HATE my parents and grandparents dragn my ass too. Its fall time so as U know, Ohio is BEAUTIFUL this time of yr. Id suggest getn out and enjoying the weather while it lasts bcuz Im SURE snows gonna b here by Oct! I went Pumpkin pickn last yr and they had a corn maze and I felt like a damn kid! Hell, I even had more fun than the kids! Speaking of Oct......HALLOWEEN! And WHO doesnt love having the living shit scared out of them?!!! I know THIS is what my Octobers consist of.....something haunted every wknd...last yr it was Mansfield Reformatory...talk ab CREEPY! Or u can stick to the "local haunt, TB Hospital"....God that just threw me back to HS! Or b thrown back n2 ur HS days and go TP'n and egg'n good 'ol Mr and Mrs Place' house!!!! Wow....talk ab showing ur AGE!!! Im thinkn u SEEM as tho u MAY have been a former classmate of mine so if ur still n Lima, sneak over and spray the stone n front of the HS that we was NVR allowed to do. We instead spray painted the fuckn roads! Back to u old ppl, I have recently discovered I enjoy goin to festivals and theres all sorts of them this time of yr, check the net for ur local activities! OR....and I was saving this for last, U can just say FUCK IT ALL and go out drinkn and go get so sloppy shitface drunk that u shart urself!!!! Now, I wouldnt suggest getn THIS drunk but go out and enjoy a night or 2 on the town for a change. For fucks SAKE get out of ur house NOW b4 it eats u alive! I can only speak for myself when I say stayn n the routine ur n, will cost u ur friends bcuz no one wants to hangout with Granny Panties and the path ur on, ur DOOMED for them at the ripe age of 29....just sayn!
Well I hope yuns have enjoyed my SECOND advice column, I know Ive enjoyed helpn!
Madd Hatter
Thanks Again, Madd Hatter! Miss Alanny has found herself BEGGING for questions, but I guess Madd Hatter is the advice master you people truly trust... whatever - just send your questions to missalanny@gmail.com.
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